I’m sure you’ve heard of schadenfreude. By now almost everyone has. German word, it means the joy you feel at another’s despair. Yet even the Germans don’t have a word for the joy you feel in your own despair. That oxymoronic concept has thus far escaped the people of Goethe. And yet it’s there. I know it. Gleespair, should you ever have call to use this word for yourself.
My son and my niece have continued to claw at each others’ throats, and yet the situation is now resolved. It is a resolution that brings me great sadness, and yet there is a also relief that it is finally ended, and there is also a perverse joy at the beauty of the solution. It is, in some ways, like the pages of my novels have leapt from the keyboard into my life. Did life imitate art, or did I see this coming and write it in advance?
Your children’s behavior depends on a good upbringing
– R. Hilton
I wish my life had the capacity to surprise me. It doesn’t. Picture that which will subtract what little happiness I still possess, and you may be assured it will happen.
My sister, Horta is the one bright spot remaining in my life, the one person who will be by my side no matter what, and in whom I may rely. To be fair, that remains true, but I fear it will soon come to an end. My son and her daughter have begun an unholy rivalry that must inevitably end with her expulsion. And my sister, I am sure, will not forgive me that.
I wish it could be otherwise. I fear that Horta will leave with Skrull, even should I wait to pull the trigger until she is an adult.
Timing changes everything. It can take something that might be shocking and make it acceptable, but it can also do the opposite.
My father, Charlie, died this week. He outlived Mother and saw his grandchildren grow into a rowdy crowd. We all knew he had to go sometime, but his solid presence, his daily runs, and his fantastic joy managed to persuade us he’d always be there. His generosity of spirit inspired his grandchildren during the many occasions that their more unfortunate parents were at each others’ throats. It humbles me that I can no longer rely on him to guide my children.
I am a weak man, and probably a bad one. “That which I would, I do not. That which I would not is what I do.” It’s an old quote, but that’s probably because it’s true. I’m not the first to fall to temptation, and I will not be the last. More’s the pity.
The Devil in a Cowgirl Hat found me in a moment of weakness. And God help me, she is good at her craft.
Marriage is a sacred institution – so you should engage in it as often as possible.
– E. Taylor
Sharks gotta swim, bats gotta fly. Peyton’s got to… Well, she’s got to screw up every relationship she can and leave a trail of broken lives in her twisted wake.
No, our marriage is not going as well as I might hope. And I understand that General Custer had a bad day at Little Big Horn.
Do I sound bitter? Yes. Well, I hope to show you why. Let’s start at the beginning, shall we? I got married to Peyton Place, as planned. The ceremony went well. Dad, Horta, and my brothers were all there for it, and Peyton was radiant. I really thought she was happy. The more fool I.
This entry was to have been my introduction. It still is, for all that. But what should be a simple, joyous occasion is marred by the sad news I must deliver. My debut announcement is to tell you that my mother, Thrintun Alien, has passed on.
May her spirit ever soar among the stars she so loved.
We have laid her to rest beside my grandfather and grandmother, Motie and Candice.
I’m told that old soldiers never die, they just fade away. I hope the same is true of old astronauts, even though no one famous has ever given that exact quote. I’ve strutted and fretted my hour upon the stage, and hopefully have provided a bit more than just sound and fury. What? You think I’ve never read Shakespeare?
Anyway, as you may have guessed, I’m signing off. Tholian will take over the blog and the house next week. I don’t have to, not just yet, but Dad turned things over to me a little early too, so that much leniency is permitted. There’s no realistic way for any of the other kids to take over from him anyway. As for me, I’m not quite ready to go yet, but age takes its toll on all of us, and on me no less. I look good for an old lady, no doubt, but I am an old lady now and it’s time for the young bucks to take the reins.
So what else is there to say? Plenty. It’s been a good run but it ain’t over just yet.